#38: Destiny's Child.....

DEAR DESTINY........


Destiny..... AKA "Bug"   you were so little when I first laid my eyes on you.  You were not even two years old.   Your hair was a mess,  your clothes did not match, your little eye was turned in.... you had jelly on your chin and you were BEAUTIFUL.

It was just days after I met you that I became your babysitter...I watched you while your Mamma ran her school bus route before school.... twice a day ....5 days a week.   My youngest daughter, Kelly, wasn't yet a year old and you would lean over at her as she sat in her seat or walker on the floor and stare deep into her eyes... and say "its ok baby girl" (in your not so perfect english) when she got upset.  She knew what you were saying and would stare back into your big ole brown eyes.

I can't remember how old you were when you got your shiny silver teeth but you would smile the biggest smile so that the light would hit them and it reminds me now of the close up commercials, where that star appears when the people smile after brushing.   You were always shining.....

You were a little tom boy and followed your big brother all over the place, sometimes into places that were not quite safe for your little bug self....  but you never had a fear....of anything.

I think back to you jumping on your mother's lap and head as she was trying to talk , and then laughing because she couldn't really talk ...about much when you were wide open!  You would snatch up a ferret or a cat, or a fish or anything you could snatch.  You would make mud pies.  You would swing as "high as the sky"  and I was afraid for your little self....but you never were.

I would bathe you, brush your hair and paint your nails right along with Kelly.... and then puff the Johnsons baby powder on you both after a day swimming and playing outside...and the two of you would giggle and squench up your noses at each other.

I think back to when you were 3 and I took you to a food show.  You loved to eat and didn't discriminate between many foods.   You had your plate and were about 3 kids down from me in the line.  The servers would put our choices on the plates in front of us.   You wanted pasta salad and the server just wasn't doing it fast enough for you ,  and I wasn't fast enough to catch you either,  your tiny little hand reached over into the bowl and grabbed a fist full of that pasta salad and into your mouth it went!   I looked at the server and apologized as he grumbled and had to dump out the entire bowl , due to health regulations...... I laugh now but wasn't laughing exactly at the moment.

Time passed and things happened and both my family and yours moved to Powhatan.   The same neighborhood,  and once again I babysat you ...for a couple of years at least...until your Dad remarried and then it was only "once in a while."

I think back ...... you were 9, 10, 11 and 12 coming by my house with your friends and introducing me as your "other mother."   You would occasionally come hang out and "help me" cook or make crafts or just hang out.  It wasn't long after that ,  that I didn't see you unless you were upset or needed a "place to be."   You were a teenager and would check in .   Your personality never changed...that Fearless little Bug, turned into the Fearless teenager that you were.    I would see you at football games or walking around the lake .... so beautiful and grown up .... for only 14 or 15 years old... I worried a lot about you and what your "Destiny" would be.


Your spirit .... was wild and carefree....your spirit, your FEARLESS spirit has always been your path.  Sometimes that spirit butted heads with my own spirit.... that has many more fears than you ....


You were always walking or stepping on the brink of danger but your Dad said, you would be okay because he gave you to God.... to take care of when you were too big of a handful for him...or anyone really....Your "dixie darling" self  professed that you didn't believe in God but you did believe in Guardian Angels (your mom) ....so promises made to God didn't matter....and I worried.... but you....remained fearless.....

Somehow.... Destiny Rose .. you could always talk me into whatever you wanted....that you got from your Dad...you are a hard worker like him too.... I remember once I posted what I was cooking ...on FB and you said "where's mine" and I promptly fixed you a plate and delivered it to ya.... I remember when ever you needed a shoulder, an ear, a hug, a dollar or an alibi ...you could get it one way or another....that Fearless Warrior in you..... could melt my heart.... along with lots of other peoples... its just who you are...you can pick up right where you left off with many people and tug on their heart strings with those big ole brown eyes.... that laugh...yea its contagious and it gets what it wants...every time.....

I would tell you more than once...that your mamma would kick your butt if she was still alive...flirting with disaster...every chance you got...but now...when I think back, maybe she wouldn't because after all....that apple didn't fall far from the tree....


I don't get to see you ...or your boys very often, really not at all these days, but I watch you on FB and online and those precious little ones from afar.....

Your Mom..... She would be proud of you, you are a hard worker... and your precious young boys .... and maybe she is right there on your shoulder, where you wanted that tattoo to be.... looking over you making sure your "Destiny"..... was a good one.... and that you would be OK.... Fearless ....without care or concern of consequences , but rolling with the punches and laughing all the while....